Infidelity can feel like an emotional earthquake in a romantic relationship—upending trust, emotional intimacy, and a sense of stability. Whether it’s a physical affair or emotional infidelity, the discovery often leaves one or both partners reeling from the initial shock, overwhelmed by feelings of betrayal, grief, anger, and confusion. Questions begin to surface: Can our relationship survive this? Should we stay together? Is rebuilding trust even possible?
For many couples, the answer lies in couples counselling for infidelity. In Sydney, Lidia Smirnov—an experienced therapist with extensive experience in relationship therapy—provides a compassionate, non-judgmental space where couples can begin their healing journey. Through a tailored counselling process grounded in evidence-based techniques, Lidia helps partners unpack what happened, make sense of the pain, and decide on the best path forward—together.
What Causes Infidelity? A Deeper Look Beneath the Surface
Infidelity is rarely just a spur-of-the-moment decision. Instead, it often reflects deeper relationship issues or underlying challenges within the individuals or the relationship dynamics itself.
Some common factors that lead to affairs include:
- Emotional disconnection and lack of physical intimacy
- Communication breakdown and unresolved conflict
- Low self-esteem, body image concerns, or desire for validation
- Financial difficulties, life stress, or major transitions like co-parenting or career changes
- A craving for excitement or to escape emotional turmoil
At its core, infidelity may reveal unmet emotional or psychological needs in the primary relationship. In therapy sessions, Lidia supports couples in understanding the root causes in a way that is non-blaming and focused on healing. This deeper understanding helps couples move beyond the event of the affair to examine the relational patterns that made their bond vulnerable in the first place.
Why Professional Support is Essential
Trying to navigate the aftermath of infidelity alone can prolong emotional pain, worsen mental health, and strain already fragile communication. Couples therapy, especially when led by a skilled relationship counsellor, provides a supportive space to:
- Process emotional trauma without escalating conflict
- Share feelings and stories in a safe, structured setting
- Explore whether to repair or part ways with clarity and compassion
- Begin rebuilding an honest, emotionally connected relationship
Lidia uses the Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT) and the Gottman Method Couples Therapy, two highly respected and evidence-based modalities for affair recovery. These approaches focus on building emotional safety, restoring emotional connection, and improving conflict resolution skills that support long-term healing.
Types of Therapy for Infidelity
There is no one-size-fits-all solution to healing from infidelity. The right therapy creates room for flexibility and tailored support. Couples may benefit from a mix of the following approaches:
- Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT): Understanding your attachment style and how to build secure, functional connections.
- Gottman Method Couples Therapy: Enhances friendship, rebuilds trust, and improves communication skills.
- Individual Therapy: Helps each partner process emotions such as guilt, anger, shame, or confusion.
- Family Therapy: Particularly important for married couples with children, addressing ripple effects on parenting and co-parenting.
As a skilled therapist in private practice, Lidia combines these modalities depending on the stage of healing, the relationship issues, and the readiness of each person involved.
The Affair Recovery Journey
The journey through affair recovery counselling is rarely linear. Couples often cycle through many emotions and stages before reaching clarity or closure. This therapeutic process typically involves:
1. Discovery & Stabilisation: Managing the initial shock, emotional upheaval, and learning to stay grounded
2. Understanding & Accountability: Exploring the reasons the affair occurred, acknowledging responsibility without blame
3. Repair & Reconnection: Practising open communication, healing wounds, and slowly restoring emotional and physical intimacy
4. Renewal or Resolution: Deciding whether to recommit or respectfully separate with insight and integrity
Each stage is approached at a pace that honours each partner’s experience. The goal is not just to recover from the affair but to create a stronger foundation for a future marked by empathy, honesty, and resilient connection.
Marriage Counselling After Infidelity
In marriage counselling, the stakes often feel heavier. Married couples frequently share financial commitments, parenting responsibilities, and long-term life plans. An affair can feel like a devastating breach of every one of those connections.
Therapy focuses on:
- Understanding how infidelity disrupted the marital dynamic
- Addressing concerns about co-parenting and family wellbeing
- Reigniting emotional intimacy and physical closeness
- Rebuilding trust in a supportive environment
With time and commitment, many couples not only survive but emerge stronger and more attuned to one another’s emotional needs.
Couples Counselling: Rebuilding a New Relationship Together
Some partners realise their pre-affair relationship was lacking the depth, safety, or connection they truly wanted. Relationship counselling offers space to rebuild—not just repair. This includes:
- Defining new relationship expectations and boundaries
- Building deeper connections through rituals, quality time, and shared meaning
- Practising active listening and mutual validation
- Learning to express emotional needs without fear or shame
In Lidia’s counselling services, therapy sessions become a place to rediscover what it means to be a team again—to feel emotionally connected, supported, and seen.
Common Challenges (and How to Overcome Them)
The path to recovery isn’t easy. Most couples encounter obstacles like:
- Persistent trust issues or emotional triggers
- The hurt partner needs more time than expected
- Cycles of guilt, blame, or avoidance
- Struggles to communicate effectively
With Lidia’s support, couples learn practical tools for managing conflict, regulating emotions, and reinforcing emotional safety—so these moments don’t derail their progress.
Finding the Right Therapist in Sydney
Choosing the right relationship counsellor is key. Look for someone who:
- Has extensive experience working with infidelity
- Offers counselling services grounded in evidence-based methods like PACT and the Gottman Method
- Creates a non-judgmental space for open exploration
- Understands the complex emotional dynamics that follow betrayal
In Sydney, Lidia Smirnov stands out as a compassionate, highly qualified therapist dedicated to helping couples rebuild trust, clarity, and courage.
Final Thoughts: There Is a Path Forward
Infidelity changes everything—but it doesn’t have to end everything. With the right support, many couples come through this challenging time with a deeper understanding of each other and a renewed commitment to a successful relationship.
Whether you’re reeling from emotional affairs, navigating the aftermath of lost trust, or simply unsure of the next step, know that affair recovery counselling can help you make sense of the pain and forge a way forward. With skilled relationship counselling, there is always hope for healing.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does couples counselling work after infidelity?
Yes. When one or both partners are committed to the counselling process, therapy can help restore trust, improve communication skills, and rebuild emotional connection through evidence-based techniques.
What type of therapy is best for infidelity?
Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy and Gottman Method Couples Therapy are both effective for affair recovery, helping couples explore emotional needs, rebuild intimacy, and learn healthier ways to communicate.
Can a relationship go back to normal after infidelity?
Most relationships don’t return to the old “normal.” Instead, with supportive therapy, couples can build a new, healthier relationship with stronger emotional and physical bonds.
How long does therapy for infidelity usually take?
The number of therapy sessions varies depending on the couple’s needs, history, and progress. Some may benefit from a few months of therapy, while others engage longer for deeper healing.
Can counselling help even if only one partner is willing to attend?
Yes. Individual therapy can be incredibly helpful for processing betrayal, managing emotional turmoil, and understanding your own needs and goals—even if your partner isn’t yet ready to attend.
